Saturday, November 27, 2010

30 Days of Thanks—Day #3

I am grateful for a few hours of deep, uninterrupted sleep. Since Hudson died, the combination of grief and pregnancy has left me a largely restless sleeper for six months. I don’t have trouble falling asleep at bedtime, but I often wake up around 2AM, have a hard time going back to sleep, and then sleep fitfully the rest of the night, tossing and turning and waking frequently (and worrying that I am keeping Ed awake, too). And I spend a lot of those waking hours letting my mind wander to places it shouldn’t (like the hospital, how we are going to celebrate Hudson’s birthday in a few days, all the things that could go wrong with the Penguin).

Last night, I woke up a few times to go to the bathroom (one of these days, I will stop drinking full glasses of water after 8PM, especially when I am pregnant), but each time, I felt as though I had slept a full night’s worth in a few hours. Maybe it was the long day of cooking, eating, and entertaining little ones, but I slept hard, without dreaming or even moving, it seemed. Each time I woke, I remember feeling thankful for being able to sleep that hard. My poor body needs it badly.

Blessings come in the simplest of packages—I just have to recognize them.

3 comments:

  1. Bless your 30 days of thanksgiving, Mandy. That's something we all could do with - maybe I'll try it too - just for myself when home in Newburyport, after celebrating Thanksgiving in New York City with my family.

    Rebecca

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  2. For every extra minute you get, some healing is done. I'm thankful every day to have found you. You are an inspiration.
    Hang on.
    Claire

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  3. Good luck with the water thing. I found if I didn't drink a glass before bed then I would wake up at the same time in the middle of the night, but parched instead of needing to use the restroom. I even tried 1/2 a glass of water, and then had to use the restroom and get a glass of water. Keep on drinking. It's good for the penguin. Love, Kirsten L.

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