A chronicle of my journey of learning to live again after the loss of my precious daughter, Hudson, and my attempt to find meaning in her death
Friday, September 24, 2010
My Big Girl
I looked at this photo the other day and thought it might be the closest we’ll ever come to knowing what Hudson would have looked like as an older child.
My big girl.
My precious, sweet, brilliant, loving, free-spirited girl.
In each of the interactions that Hudson and I had, it was remarkable to me how sophisticated she was for her age. Really stunningly deep.
I will never forget the hand on my cheek "thank you" she gave me, looking into my eyes and hugging me, when we shared the feta cheese and black olives on my greek salad.
This, within days of learning to walk!
I also remember how she immediately got down when she was satisfied, and practiced her steps while we finished our meal.
She is so very special. I wish we could do it all again.
I know I'm not the first stranger to say it, but reading Hudson's story has forever changed my life. As a friend of MaryHenry's, I was aware of your terrible loss when it happened, and found your blog soon after you started it. Nate was a few months old at the time, and I was wallowing in exhaustion and frustration, rather than savoring each minute with him. Thanks to your courage in sharing your story, I never stay in that place for more than 5 minutes anymore. I look forward to seeing the weight lift from you a little, however long that takes, and someday seeing another great love enter your life, another child who (like Hudson) will be blessed to have a mama like you.
Before I saw this post, and saw this picture on Facebook, my first thought was how much older Hudson looks in this picture than in all the others I've seen of her. Those beautiful, wise, eyes, and hair that is almost ready for pigtails. It's so unfair-- thinking of you right now.
I'm deeply touched by the outpouring of love for Hudson. I'm tearing as I write this and am grateful that her memory will live on in the lives of children of all ages. Thanks to everyone who donated books in the memory of this precious, beautiful child.jg
Such an adorable, beautiful girl.
ReplyDeleteShe is so beautiful. She looks like you, Mandy. It is so terribly unfair that she is not still here with you.
ReplyDeleteShe's so beautiful. She'll always be your girl, even if she's not here on earth with you.
ReplyDeleteShe was beautiful and had such soulful eyes -- not the eyes of a 17 month old for sure.
ReplyDeleteMandy, she is just stunningly beautiful. I'm so, so sorry.
ReplyDeleteClaire
In each of the interactions that Hudson and I had, it was remarkable to me how sophisticated she was for her age. Really stunningly deep.
ReplyDeleteI will never forget the hand on my cheek "thank you" she gave me, looking into my eyes and hugging me, when we shared the feta cheese and black olives on my greek salad.
This, within days of learning to walk!
I also remember how she immediately got down when she was satisfied, and practiced her steps while we finished our meal.
She is so very special. I wish we could do it all again.
Diane
Oh, Mandy. She's just beautiful. She looks so happy and so loved. My heart aches that she's not still here growing and playing with you.
ReplyDeleteShe is so beautiful...so precious!!
ReplyDeleteI know I'm not the first stranger to say it, but reading Hudson's story has forever changed my life. As a friend of MaryHenry's, I was aware of your terrible loss when it happened, and found your blog soon after you started it. Nate was a few months old at the time, and I was wallowing in exhaustion and frustration, rather than savoring each minute with him. Thanks to your courage in sharing your story, I never stay in that place for more than 5 minutes anymore. I look forward to seeing the weight lift from you a little, however long that takes, and someday seeing another great love enter your life, another child who (like Hudson) will be blessed to have a mama like you.
ReplyDeleteYour daughter is beautiful. She looks like what the ladies at my mother's church used to call 'an old soul', wise beyond her years. xo
ReplyDeleteBefore I saw this post, and saw this picture on Facebook, my first thought was how much older Hudson looks in this picture than in all the others I've seen of her. Those beautiful, wise, eyes, and hair that is almost ready for pigtails. It's so unfair-- thinking of you right now.
ReplyDeleteI'm deeply touched by the outpouring of love for Hudson. I'm tearing as I write this and am grateful that her memory will live on in the lives of children of all ages. Thanks to everyone who donated books in the memory of this precious, beautiful child.jg
ReplyDelete