Stronger

Watch this first if you haven’t already. I want you feeling really inspired before you read the rest. Because I am going to ask you to do something big. 
(And sorry for the stupid ad.)


Now, Kelly Clarkson would not normally be my choice for inspirational music, but this time she (inadvertently), and these awesome kids on the hemoncology floor at Seattle Children’s Hospital (very intentionally) have hit the nail on the head. Just imagine these kids (and their parents and me) singing these words directly to their diseases as they battle to kick those diseases to the curb:

You know the bed feels warmer
Sleeping here alone
You know I dream in color
And do the things I want

You think you got the best of me
Think you’ve had the last laugh
Bet you think that everything good is gone
Think you left me broken down
Think that I’d come running back
Baby you don’t know me, cause you’re dead wrong

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn’t mean I’m lonely when I’m alone
What doesn’t kill you makes a fighter
Footsteps even lighter
Doesn’t mean I’m over cause you’re gone

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, stronger
Just me, myself and I
What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn’t mean I’m lonely when I’m alone

You heard that I was starting over with someone new
They told you I was moving on, over you
You didn’t think that I’d come back
I’d come back swinging
You try to break me, but you see

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn’t mean I’m lonely when I’m alone
What doesn’t kill you makes a fighter
Footsteps even lighter
Doesn’t mean I’m over cause you’re gone

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, stronger
Just me, myself and I
What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn’t mean I’m lonely when I’m alone

Thanks to you I got a new thing started
Thanks to you I’m not the broken-hearted
Thanks to you I’m finally thinking about me
You know in the end the day you left was just my beginning

In the end...
What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn’t mean I’m lonely when I’m alone
What doesn’t kill you makes a fighter
Footsteps even lighter
Doesn’t mean I’m over cause you’re gone

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, stronger
Just me, myself and I
What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn’t mean I’m lonely when I’m alone
When I’m alone...
It may be cliché, clichés are clichés because they are true. What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger.

Feeling inspired yet? Good, because I’m about to ask you to do something big.

The first time I trained for a triathlon with Team in Training in 2005, I had no personal connection to the mission of the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. I was training and fundraising in memory of my mom, who had died of pancreatic cancer. The second time I trained for a triathlon with Team in Training this past spring, I had no personal connection to the mission of LLS at the beginning. I was running in memory of Hudson and in honor of all children fighting blood cancers and their parents who are trying to save their lives.

This time, the connection is personal. This time, I am running for me and for all other people battling blood cancers right now who can’t train for triathlons.

You heard me right. I am going to train for another triathlon with Team in Training this summer, while I am still in treatment. Ed and I had already discussed the possibility that we might train to race as a relay at the Wilmington YMCA Sprint Triathlon in September, with him doing the swim, another friend doing the bike, and me doing the run. I figured training for a 5k would be pretty easy during chemo and would be a good way to keep myself motivated to exercise during treatment (vigorous cardio exercise has been shown to be very good for lymphoma patients in particular and is excellent in battling fatigue due to treatment). But then two things happened. First, my first week of chemo went incredibly well. I had hardly any symptoms at all except fatigue, and none that I could not manage very well with medication. And then I found out that Team in Training here in Raleigh is training for the Wilmington Sprint as part of its summer season.

I was sold. I decided I could manage to train to do a full sprint on my own, given that it is only half the distance of the Olympic race I ran last month (it’s a 1500m swim, but it’s with a current, so it’s the equivalent of about 1000m, a 12mi bike, and a 5k run). And I wanted to take a leadership role in TNT for the first time. So I emailed the triathlon coordinator to volunteer as a mentor. As it turns out, they already have two mentors for the season, but asked me if I would like to be an Honored Teammate for the team, and I agreed immediately. Honored Teammates are members of the team, either training or not, who are personally battling or have already survived a blood cancer. The Honored Teammate’s job is to remind participants about the real-life impact that their training and fundraising is having on real patients right now. Seemed like the perfect job for me.

So there you have it. I am training for another TNT triathlon this summer. The best part is that the race is on September 22. If all goes well with my treatment, I will have my last chemo infusion on August 14 and will be fully finished with treatment as of August 28. Which means that this race will be one giant celebration of being CURED OF CANCER! How much STRONGER can I get than that?!

So I said at the beginning that I was going to ask you to do something big after you watched the video. I hope you’re feeling inspired, because I want to ask you to consider doing an event with Team in Training yourself. If you live in the Triangle, I REALLY want you to consider doing the Wilmington Sprint Triathlon with me. There are other Triangle summer season events, including marathons/half marathons, century rides, and strenuous hike adventure programs, and it would be great if you signed up for any of those, too, but I am really hoping to recruit a few friends (including Ed) as teammates to train with me for this summer season. I can promise you that even if you think you can’t swim a lap, you will be able to swim a mile by the time the season is over. If you think you can’t bike a mile, you will be able to bike 20 by September. If you think you can’t run 10 feet, you’ll be able to run a 5k by the end of summer. And not only will you be able to do all of those things, you’ll be able to do them in a row. I’ve seen it happen. TNT provides you with coaching, mentoring, fundraising support of all kinds—they make it so easy for you and all you have to do is put in the time and the miles. I know the time isn’t easy. Really, I do. I was lucky enough (and will be again this summer) to not be working while training, so I don’t mean to poo poo those of you who have real work commitments. But I have also seen people who work full time AND have kids train for these races. And a sprint distance won’t require quite as MUCH time as training for an Olympic distance would—you don’t need to be able to run for an hour, so you won’t have to spend too much time in training trying to do that. But if you don’t want to commit to three different sports, definitely consider one of the other events that involves only one. And if you’ve ALREADY participated in endurance sports, then this is a no-brainer for you. Just do it! But this time, train with an awesome group of people and raise money for an awesome group of people and cause at the same time. And if you think you are too old (you know who you are and yes, I am looking at you), YOU ARE NOT!  I got passed by women in their 60s and 70s out there on the race course. You are not too old. And if you think there’s no way you can raise $2000 or $3000, just trust me: you can. And TNT will make sure you can.

And let me just throw this last little bit in there:  if I can do this right now, you can. 

Basically what I’m saying is that any reason you can think of not to do it, I can think of a solution (well, except for childcare, which I know is also a huge impediment—hopefully if you have kids, you also have a really supportive partner like mine who is willing to carry a little extra load for just a few months). And as your Honored Teammate, it will be my job to help keep you motivated during the season so that you don’t end up scratching your head going, “Why I am doing this?” I will be there to tell you why.

You CAN do it. And I really hope you will. And if you do, once you come to the end, you won’t even believe what you’ve done. The feeling of real accomplishment is unlike many others you will experience in your life. And on top of that, you will have raised a couple thousand dollars (or more if you set your sights high!) to help people like me, and more importantly, to help kids like those in that video. And their parents, who spend every waking and sleeping moment wondering if their children will make it to their next birthdays. Even though I am doing this race for me, I am still, still doing it for them, too.

So if you think you are game, or if you at least just want to learn more, do one of a few things.

1. Go to an interest meeting and learn more about TNT and the summer training programs and events. In the Triangle, here are the dates:

* Sat, May 19th at 10:30am at Caribou Coffee in Raleigh
* Tues, May 22nd at 7:00pm at REI Raleigh in North Hills
* Thurs, May 24th at 6:30pm at Tyler's Tap Room in Durham
* Tuesday, May 29th at 7:00pm at Fleet Feet Carrboro in Carrboro
* KickOff Celebration - Saturday, June 9th at 9:30am at the Athletic Performance Center in

Directions to all these meetings, as well as info about meetings in the Triad, Charlotte, and Wilmington, can be found here.

If you are not in North Carolina, you can visit TNT’s website and put in your zip code to learn about the program in your area. And if there is no program in your area, or you really need flexibility, you can do the Flex option, where you can train on your own, but with total support from coaching staff virtually—they will plan an individualized training program for you and check in with you weekly on your progress, and then you will meet your teammates on event weekend.

2. Register NOW! If I’ve already convinced you, then just sign up here.  If you sign up before Friday, you can use coupon code “ncfallfortnt” to receive 50% off your registration fee. After Friday it is still only $75 and this goes directly toward your fundraising minimum.

3. Share this blog with anyone and everyone you know and encourage them to do it, too.

If you have any doubts about Team in Training as a fundraising organization, I encourage you to read about its history and about where the money goes. Since its inception in 1988, Team in Training athletes have raised more than 1.2 BILLION DOLLARS to support research, patient education, and patient services for people with blood cancers. That number alone should tell you that this is an organization worth fundraising for.

And if I haven’t convinced you to participate (insert Charlie Brown teacher “wah-woh“ here), then you know I am going to ask you to give some money. I haven’t set up my fundraising page yet, but I have another way for you to give right now that is very personal to my own cancer treatment right this very minute. My fabulous PA, John Strader (the one who gave me a nearly pain-free bone marrow biopsy, remember?), is a candidate for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society’s Man & Woman of the Year program. This is a fundraising competition where community leaders commit to using their personal networks to raise as much money as possible for LLS in a short ten-week period. John is himself a survivor of non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma, has run 18 marathons, at least half of which were after he was cured of cancer, and is just an all-around phenomenal person and medical professional. Basically, you can vote for him by donating money to his MWOY campaign here, and if he “wins” by raising the most money for LLS, some portion of the dollars raised come directly back to the UNC Cancer Hospital (i.e., back to me as patient!).  

So there. I did it. A big ask. A really big ask, I know. But I hope you will think about it. If you need some more time to decide, just watch the video again. Another 3 minutes and 35 seconds ought to help you make up your mind.

What doesn’t kill them will make them stronger. What doesn’t kill me will make me stronger (don’t I know it?). What doesn’t kill you (and I promise TNT won’t kill you) will make you stronger.

If you don't do it, you may regret it. But if you do, you will never regret it. 

Let’s all be stronger. Join me and TNT this summer.